Disappointed, stressed and too much swearing!

As I mentioned in my last post, I’ve barely done enough running. I am now exactly 1 month away from the Disneyland Paris half marathon and not gone above 10k this is now leading me to a crisis of self confidence, I literally do not believe that I can or will be able to do this and I’m disappointed in myself for thinking and feeling that.

I feel if I don’t do it, that would be the biggest let down ever, so I’m still holding out hope that I’ll catch the bug and the next 6 weeks will be gloriously filled with running. *Here’s hoping*

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Where did it all go wrong? 

Firstly, I didn’t follow a solid plan. Secondly, what I was doing fell to pieces cause life got in the way, Holiday, Parties, Boys etc. All of these things have been great and made the summer AMAZING, however I’ve not been focused on the goals and been more focused on living in the moment and enjoying whats going on around me. Not such a bad thing, but right now I’ve come crashing hard. As of now, not including the Paris weekend where I have to run, I have no holidays or big plans of any sorts to look forward to, so the next thing on my check list is this big running event I feel unprepared and overwhelmed for.

Then anxiety and emotions take over and here I am just wanting to dig a hole, climb in, curl up into a ball (probably listen to Adele) and forget my troubles.

So unfortunately my weekly update for last week is this. I failed, I am a failure, and so far this week I am failing again too. I am not happy to say that or share it but there is no point being dishonest with my readers.

How am I going to fix this?

  1. I’m going to just say FUCK THIS and get on with it. I’ve always been average in everything I’ve ever done (yes i’m talking about you GCSE’s/Btech/Degree) so why stop now. I have always felt like I was destined to be that one average person, there is nothing special about me.
  2.  I’M GOING TO DO MORE THAN 10K THIS WEEK!

 

Apologies for the misery, if you want something to cheer you up… Look at these sparkly ears I got for my trip! I’m going to wear the fuck out of these with my shiny bloody Medal.

 

Anyways tips and advice are always welcome… sorry for the profanity! I’m stressed.

thanks

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3 thoughts on “Disappointed, stressed and too much swearing!

  1. YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE! We all get sidetracked. Frankly there is a lot in life that is better than running lol! On my last half marathon I hadnt run more than 7 miles in training. It was hard, but I did it. I walked some and i’m not ashamed of that. You’ll be at a disney race so there will be plenty of people walking. Even if you ran the first 10k then walked the next you still wouldnt be anywhere near the back of the pack. Just get as much running in as you can in the next few weeks so that it helps your mind to feel a little more confident but don’t push it and injure yourself. Maybe try and do 1 or 2 8-milers. I think if you are happy doing 8 you will be fine in a disney race doing 13.1. They are so pressure free, you will be absolutely fine! Just enjoy the experience and don’t worry about times or stopping to walk. I believe you can do this! You just need to convince yourself to believe it now 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you. I’m just worried as I have the royal parks to do as well! None of my colleagues have trained much for it but I’m sure they will be much faster/consistent than me! My aim is to enjoy Disney and hopefully do better on the Royal parks! Thanks for your help xx

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Pingback: Weekly Update: 22nd-28th August | megandaniella

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